S04/ E06 The Tower

in , , , ,

The Tower is the story of a smart office building that’s mad about Paul Reiser. This high Reiser is the latest in smart technology (beside Paul’s hair plugs) that really hates musicians (especially keyboard players).

When Die Hard meets Seinfeld that meets Robin Concord from Cheers in a sauna you have a feature film…a tv movie…a TV show…oh god we don’t know what this is!

We watched The Tower!

S04/ E04 The Architect

in , , , , , ,

When you are in a lonely relationship and all that matters to you is money and how you look to other people then the next logical step is to build your dream house so you can keep up with your “friends”…if this is you then you are the main characters of The Architect.

This vapid couple then teams up with a pretentious architect who feels he can build them a house they want but never asked for.

Jesus Christ everyone in this movie is pathetic BUT oddly enough, you find a level headed construction manager and another architect that would have completed this dream house on time and under budget. They use the level head construction manager but even he gets consumed by the tidal wave that is a hopeless architect and insipid couple.

We watched the Architect!

archi-speak 003: future-casting

in ,

Oftentimes designers are asked to predict the future so a client can spend their money wisely. Unfortunately, we are not precognitive. Instead we use magic words like “FUTURE-CASTING” to sound more like Philip K Dick than an actual dick.

Special thanks to our guest, Aly Pierce, for setting the record straight.

S04/ E03 The Christmas Cottage

in , , , ,

This is a story of an interior designer whose BFF asks her to be maid of honor, but she must take on a few responsibilities—such as making sure the family cottage is perfect for the honeymoon. Legend has it that if newlyweds spend their first night there, everlasting love and happiness follow. Not to mention cold vanilla emotionless sex.

When you mix BFFs, old lovers, fake snow, lonliness and magic——you get a film called The Christmas Cottage starring Jared Padalecki…..wait that’s not the film….it’s the one WITHOUT Jared Padalecki. Sorry Supernatural fans.

archi-speak 002: disruption

in , , , , ,

sometimes when an outsider hears the words used by a design professional, their meaning gets muddied. is she really going to “massage” the plan? does he really get turned on by a glossy, white, metal detail by calling it “sexy?” why exactly are a&d professionals hijacking the tech darling “ux?” in our companion micro-cast, we explore some of the vocab words with past guests of the show to try to decipher: archi-speak.

thanks to matt carter for chatting about: DISRUPTION

S04/ E02 Land of the Pharoahs

in , , ,

When someone says they are “as old as dirt”, they are referring to the characters in this film. Even eons ago architects thought they were great and had all the answers. This is a time when architects didn’t wear pretentious beady glasses. Instead they named themselves Vashtar and faked their way through a project. On second thought, things haven’t changed. The problem is when a Pharaoh has fallen for a cold hearted vixen it screws up his plan for greatness and a life of swimming in his riches like Scrooge McDuck. You’ve heard the story a thousand times; well now you can see it from a thousand years ago.

We give you Land of the Pharaohs!

starchitect: Matthew Poncelow

archi-speak 001: experience

in , , ,

sometimes when an outsider hears the words used by a design professional, their meaning gets muddied. is she really going to “massage” the plan? does he really get turned on by a glossy, white, metal detail by calling it “sexy?” why exactly are a&d professionals hijacking the tech darling “ux?” in our companion micro-cast, we explore some of the vocab words with past guests of the show to try to decipher: archi-speak.

thanks to kevin valk for kicking us off with: EXPERIENCE

S04/ E01 Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

in , , ,

Legendary movie star Cary Grant wants the perfect house in the country so he can get away from the crazy city life with his family. Before he knows it, Grant and his wife become amateur architects and interior designers and soon get in way over their heads and this city family can’t stop the train called his Dream House. We see the family man Grant in his prime.

In this precursor to The Money Pit meets Funny Farm, we give you a long movie title like Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House.

S03/ E05 Jungle Fever

in , , , ,

And we’re off to the races! In this episode we dive deep into the shallow world that is Spike Lee and the outdated film that had so much talent on camera but so little behind it.

Grab some cheap Chinese take-out, go to your office, and bang on a drafting table because tonight is the night! Minus the Dura Flame log. Sam Jackson gives a performance that can only be called the major influence in Dave Chapelle’s famous crack-head character, and Tim Robbins tries so hard to make something out of nothing.

You get Jungle Fever, she gets Jungle Fever, he gets Jungle Fever, we get Jungle Fever. Everybody gets Jungle Fever! You win! And oh yeah…..Charlie Murphy! Charlie Murphy! Charlie Murphy!

Let’s get it on!

starchitect: Aly Pierce

S03/ E02 Shattered

in , , ,

A film starring the always reliable Tom Berenger and Corbin Bernsen? No it’s not one of the Major League films….It’s Shattered! Yes, one of the many thriller/mystery films that were released in the early 90s and has been forgotten about….Well, not by Starchitects: The Podcast™!

This is a prime example of streaming causing the extinction of so many films. Is this film great? No, but it shouldn’t be forgotten! Tom Berenger plays an architect/developer whose face has been Shattered (sha oobie, shattered) by a car accident and he has to figure out why, who, what and when. All of this plus a crazy condo development on the San Francisco bay that can be developed only if the Titanic didn’t crash there…..you’ll see.

Wolfgang Petersen brought us a film that combines Goonies, Elephant Man, Mask, Red Shoe Diaries and Star Wars. Tom Berenger’s hair is second billed while Corbin Bersen’s hair was fake.

This film has laughter, joy, and loneliness and sex and sex and sex and sex. Look at us, we’re in tatters!

S02/ E12 Poltergeist

in , , , ,

Our final episode for Season Two is 1982’s summer sleeper hit "Poltergeist." Many of the practical effects of this tale brought back terrifying childhood memories of boy-eating trees, self-opening closet doors, and a base fear of clowns.

starchitect, and “Poltergeist” virgin, Graham Taylor brings his real estate nerdery to the basement to dissect the possibility of re-developing land once housing hundreds, if not thousands, of consecrated, buried bodies… and deciphering how much money Steven was making off his real estate transactions. If the amount is as much as we projected, why does their home look like a room from a 1980's Grey Gardens?

Roberta was able to find the actual house where the movie was filmed and grab an aerial shot as well as a best guess of the basic floor plan used to create and customize the house in the late seventies.

Enjoy!

starchitect: Graham Taylor

 

Tract home floor plan. The "Poltergeist House" was probably customized off this inital plan but the basic element are there, though no indication where the portal to the other-side resides and if you can relocate it to a more user friendly area like…

Tract home floor plan. The "Poltergeist House" was probably customized off this inital plan but the basic element are there, though no indication where the portal to the other-side resides and if you can relocate it to a more user friendly area like the family room....

the house where the movie was filmed. the location is public record; the original owners still own the house as in it has never been sold.

the house where the movie was filmed. the location is public record; the original owners still own the house as in it has never been sold.

S02/ E11 The Cable Guy

in , , ,

In a $20 million dollar coup, the King of Dick and Fart movies, Jim Carrey, broke a salary record for his betrayal of “Chip Douglas,” cable installer and stalker. Matthew Broderick, the center of Chip's attention, lumbers along reacting (?) to Carrey's antics in what appears to be a narcotic haze.

Ben Stiller (aka Derrick Zoolander) directs this comedy, which between you, me, and the lamp post, isn’t that funny nor is it that exciting watch. Anna Winn joins the team in the basement as we try to figure out if Carrey is spooky or trying his damnedest to people please. The team is split; you decide.

starchitect: Anna Winn

S02/ E08 Housesitter

in , , ,

“Housesitter” is as rom-com-y as it gets: jilted lover meets drastically, mismatched, kookie gal our protagonist is destined to love…. but are they?! Will they?! One giant bag of Chinese food and awkward boob touch later, Goldie Hawn’s Gwen is instantly engaged to Steve Martin’s Davis.

If we walked away with one life lesson from this fluffy piece of super fluff, it’s okay to lie. You’ll get the girl, the house, and the promotion. Go on now, lie. Frank Oz said it’s okay. Frank Oz, the voice of Super Grover, tells us it’s okay to lie.

starchitect: Alex Sklar

S02/ E07 My Architect

in , , ,

PT Barnum is noted as saying, “There’s a sucker born every minute.” Could it be an entire generation of architects were swindled by noted starchitect, Louis Kahn? He sure fit the bill of a con artist: self-assured, self-serving all while supporting secret families, mistresses, and skyrocketing personal and business debt.

Nathaniel Kahn, Louis’s youngest of his illegitimate brood, explores his father’s life through the lens of the architect’s work. But is it all it’s cracked up to be? Are we all just a bunch of suckers trying to hear what that mother f***ing brick is saying?!

starchitect: Joelle Wolinski

S02/ E06 Pacific Heights

in , , , , ,

Post “Batman,” Michael Keaton tested his menacing chops as the mysterious Carter Hayes, who turns out to be a misfit, well-to-do psychopath hell bent on making his landlords’ (Melanie Griffith and Matthew Modine) lives a living nightmare.

Vince laments: I’d totally follow Melanie into the desert to get my sex robot back any day.

The starchitects team and guest Diony Lopez talk about the realities of being a landlord in San Francisco, something Diony, Jeff, and Vince have in common. Strangely, this movie isn’t too far off in its depiction of horrific tenants who will do anything to NOT pay rent and treat apartments like absolute garbage. Even the premise of having a monkey brother isn’t beyond fiction, as Vince shared the below picture with us….

starchitect: Diony Lopez

 

photographic evidence vince has monkey brothers....

photographic evidence vince has monkey brothers....

S02/ E05 Fools Rush In

in , , , , ,

Project management. It’s a job definition most people, even those in the profession, can’t quite put their finger on. In her recent shift to project management, Roberta was able to offer some insight as to what Matthew Perry’s character was doing on the job site in “Fools Rush In.” Still, no one in the room could grasp the whole picture of scope of service… well, maybe Matthew Perry as Chandler Bing as Alex Whitman could. Could his job responsibilities BE any more vague?

Synopsis: An episode of “Friends” minus the other five. Selma Hayek is hot.

For the record: Project Managers plan, budget, oversee and document all aspects of a project. Project managers work closely with clients to make sure the scope and direction of each project is on schedule, within the planned budget and executed properly per outlined scope.

starchitect(s): Jeff Wolinski, Vince Galea, Roberta Pennington